


The Expectation of Living

by Britishchick



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Crossover, Depression, Gen, Immortal Merlin, Professor Merlin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-04
Updated: 2015-06-04
Packaged: 2018-04-02 19:20:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4071598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Britishchick/pseuds/Britishchick
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry Potter comes across an old man at the Leaky Cauldron who has lost himself to the centuries of time and sees no point to his life. Harry is determined to change that and help a stranger rediscover the meaning of happiness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Expectation of Living

The wind whistled through the smog and past the bleak roofs and glinting skyscrapers that made the London skyline. Harry Potter, with his cloak tucked tight around him, protecting him from the bitter, chilling wind, ducked into the warmth and chatter that was the Leaky Cauldron. Tom looked up and nodded at the newcomer without recognition and Harry felt a burst of pride to know that his glamours had worked so well. 

He did not often frequent the Leaky Cauldron for a drink amongst strangers but some strange urge pulled him towards the pub today. Maybe it was the added burden of becoming head auror or maybe it was to escape the pressure of stardom. Nonetheless, Harry had followed the strong impulse which had led him here to seek out a drink with some strangers.  
Joining a couple of people surrounding the bar, Harry surveyed his company for the next few hours. It wasn’t too busy, being a Sunday night but there was a surprising amount of people. There was a group of burly guys raucously laughing over a childish game of exploding snap, a group of women and men chatting avidly on bar stools about the new primeminister and the rise of Hermione Granger in the political spectrum, a teenager with her parents timidly taking what appeared to be her first sip of firewhisky and an old man hunched over his mug in a darkened corner looking entirely out of place. Even though he appeared to be hiding, retreating into the shadows and avoiding everyone’s gaze, he remained in the forefront of Harry’s vision. It was as if he was a character in one of Dudley’s high-definition films. 

The man had long white hair and beard that was even longer than what Dumbledore’s had been but definitely not as well kept. The ends were split and matted, seeming as if they hadn’t seen a comb or any form of grooming for decades. But the most curious thing about this man was his clothes. He wore muggle clothes. Harry was astonished, he didn’t think he had seen any wizard or witch over the age of 40 wear anything other than the traditional wizarding robes or some strange assortment to what they thought muggle clothing looked like. However, this old man wore proper muggle clothing complete with a beanie and fingerless gloves. Granted, the clothes were ancient and battered just like the rest of him but muggle just the same.  
From the bar came a sharp cough. Harry turned around to see Tom trying to get his attention. Harry mentally kicked himself for being inattentive, if this happened during work he could completely screw up a mission. 

“Interesting fellow, isn’t he?” Tom asked, tilting his head towards the old man. 

Harry nodded his affirmation. 

“Yeah, he comes in here from time to time, buys a drink then just sits in the corner staring at it. I don’t think he even drinks it.” 

“Do you know who he is?” Harry asked, curious. 

“Nah, doesn’t say anything other than grunt ‘I’ll have a butterbeer’ and ‘thanks’.” Tom said with a laugh. “Anyway, what can I getcha?” 

“Oh, I’ll have a butterbeer please.” Harry said, fishing out a couple of sickles. 

Tom took the sickles and went about making Harry’s drink. Harry’s eyes were drawn, as if magnetically, back to the old man. There was just something about him. There was another seat at that table, directly opposite and Harry had this sudden desire to go and sit there when he received his drink. 

Tom put Harry’s butterbeer down on the bar top with a clunk, foam sloshing down the sides and adding to the stickiness on the wooden top. 

“Good luck, trying to speak to him. I’m not entirely sure he will respond but if you find out any more information about this mysterious man do share.” Tom said with a grin. 

Harry frowned, “I wasn’t even planning-

“Of course you were! It’s written plain over your face. So, good luck!”

“Thanks?” Harry responded, confused but Tom had already turned to speak to one of the women talking about politics earlier. 

Harry eyed the empty chair and, ignoring the rational voice in his head that sounded an awful lot like Hermione, made his way over to the old man’s table. 

He pulled out the wooden chair and, even with the loud scraping sound the chair made, the old man did not look up in acknowledgement. Harry did not let that deter him, however, and slid into the chair putting his butterbeer on the table. 

“Hi,” Harry said. 

The man’s eyes finally flicked up and Harry felt a number of goosebumps raise on his arms. They were so very like Dumbledore’s: blue and seemed to hold an eon of wisdom. But what was so chilling was that his eyes were also dead. His eyes were dead as if the man was looking but not really seeing. His eyes were dead as if he was a blind man that could no longer see the colours, lights and the beauty of life. In fact, maybe the old man’s eyes were not so much like Dumbledore’s after all. Dumbledore’s eyes had always twinkled with joy and life but staring into this man’s eyes made Harry feel as if he was staring into a black hole. 

The man cleared his throat which croaked as if it hadn’t been used in a very long time. “Harry Potter,” he said before returning his regard to his full glass. 

“I’m sorry?” Harry, could still feel the magic being put into his glamour so how on earth did this man know? 

“Your scar,” the man said as if he could read his thoughts, “it’s very noticeable.” 

“My glamour is impenetrable, how on earth could you see through it?” And Harry knew his glamour was perfect his best friends hadn’t recognized him with it on. 

“Obviously it isn’t.” The man muttered, not even looking at him. 

“No, please, tell me how. Is it a spell? Could someone else be able to do this while I’m at work?” 

The old man huffed out a sigh, the hairs on his beard trembling with the outtake of breath, and met Harry’s gaze. “Don’t worry yourself, I can feel the old magic in your scar and I’m pretty I’m the only one who can sense it and be able to tell what it is.” 

Harry thought that all the last remnants of Voldemort’s dark magic had completely gone when Harry had faced the Avada Kedavra at the battle of Hogwarts. Harry’s hand immediately went up to rub his scar, as if he would be able to feel the dark magic just by touching it.

“You must be powerful then.” Harry said. 

The old man just grunted and mumbled, “I am what I am and I am what I always have been.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

The old man frowned, the wrinkles on his forehead becoming even more deepened. 

“Nothing, a bit of nonsense really. I’m not even sure if it’s relevant anymore.” 

Harry was even more bewildered. “Why isn’t it relevant anymore? I don’t understand.” 

The man hunched in on himself even more and wrapped his long, crooked fingers around his drink. “I don’t know Harry,” he said, staring at his drink like it held the answers to the universe, “he told me not to change but I’ve been waiting. I’ve been waiting for such a long time.”

“For what?” 

The man looked up his blue eyes no longer lifeless but piercing. “It was so long ago I hardly remember, it feels like a distant dream… sometimes I’m not entirely sure if what I am waiting for will happen.” His eyes were wide with emotion. Suddenly, this old man seemed very, very young. 

“Well what’s the point in waiting then?”

The old man scoffed. “Destiny.” Ah, now Harry knew all about that. Destiny was a heavy burden. 

“You know who I am,” Harry said, “and you must know that I had a ‘destiny’ but I still had time to live. To laugh and have fun.” 

The old man’s lips trembled. “I haven’t laughed in such a long time.”

It was right then and there that Harry decided he would help this old man find happiness again. 

 

\--- 

 

When he got home, he decided that he needed an extra brain on this matter and decided to firecall Hermione. 

Her reaction was pretty much as he expected. 

“You sat down opposite a random man, who obviously did not want company because you had an ‘urge’ to? Harry, you’re an auror! No, you’re head auror! You should know better than that!” Hermione exclaimed, frustration clear on her face. 

“You don’t understand Hermione. He looked so broken, so defeated and he talked about giving up due to the burden of destiny. I know how that feels and he’s just given up. It’s as if his life has no meaning anymore and nobody deserves to feel that! I can help him, Hermione. I know I can!” 

Hermione put her head in her hands and took a deep breath. 

“You and your compulsiveness, I swear.” 

Harry grinned, knowing he’d won. “So you’ll help me?” He asked. 

“How can I say no when you put it to me like that?”

**Author's Note:**

> This was battered out on my keyboard instead of studying for French. I know, I know, I should be studying and sleeping for that matter.
> 
> So anyways, there are many fics with Merlin waiting for Arthur for centuries but he never gives up (not really) and still stays his happy, cheery self. It's my belief that facing the centuries alone causes change if not damage to someone so I decided to write a fic which starts off with a Merlin broken and depressed from the ravages of time and regaining the liveliness he once had.
> 
> I also wanted to write a Harry Potter and Merlin crossover as the two worlds coincide so greatly together but there aren't many fanfics out there on it (well there are just not enough in my opinion). So I combined the two ideas together and voila, here is the product.
> 
> Don't worry, the next chapters will be much longer as I'll finally be done with my exams as of tomorrow.
> 
> This is unbeta'd so sorry for any of the mistakes made! And positive criticism is greatly encouraged! Oh and I don't own Merlin or Harry Potter. They belong to Shine, BBC and JK Rowling.


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